Grieving process on death

On the death of a very close loved one, an individual may go through many or all of the following stages in sequence:

Stages of the grieving process:

• Shock and numbness
• Outburst: “How dare you tell me he is no more …?”
• Denial – "It can't be true!"
• Disorganized – “what’s happening, I feel lost”
• Fear – "I'm scared. Will others also die?"
• Anger – "I don't want anyone, I hate you all"
• Blame – "Who is responsible?
• Shame or guilt – "I am a bad child, so he went away"
• Pining or longing – "I want him back"
• Bargaining -- living in fantasy “maybe a miracle will take place”
• Despair, hopelessness, no future – even loneliness
• Euphoria – “Now I can do what I want, I want to fly …”
• Anxiety about losing control of life – "Who will take care of me?"
• Depression – Losing motivation, interest and involvement in life
• Loss of Self Esteem – "I am good for nothing, I'm useless"
• Apathy – "I don’t care what happens"
• Acceptance – “It is reality, I cannot change it”
• Rebuilding & trying to move on in life – “Let me try and go forward”

Rebuilding

1. Distraction for immediate relief, enjoyable activities
1. Keeping up daily routine -- Official, Family, Personal, Social
2. God or spirituality or meaning of life – reading, rituals, group prayers
3. Identifying the setback, reliving the tragedy -- What happened, how it effected me
4. Tackling with ongoing problems, or expected ones (at practical level)
5. Feelings NOW – awareness of feelings very important. Can I accept my feelings?
6. Reaching out to another in similar grief. Your close relationships & your responsibility to them
7. Is there a long term solution? Can I wait?
8. The worst and most painful tragedies can be overcome with sustained efforts. The struggle is long, even painful, but it will give results.

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